The Razor's Edge

I have been here before...   It is a place that is like stopping in your tracks to say.. who am I .. where am I .. and am I really connected to anything  but the vapors that give me shape.

I watched the movie Billy Elliott last night and remembered it was the last time my Mom and I went to a movie house.  I am beginning to accept and understand beyond intellectually that everything is really impermanent.  There is solace in pain being fleeting but less in joy being on the way out as soon as it is felt.  I have just begun to recognize my sticky spots... those places that hook me to stuck... 
I get stuck to the attachment of the sensual pleasures.. a nice mean, beautiful woman, nice smell.. and i am stuck to my view and opinions... the babbles that come out of myself and others
I hold to notions...concepts... beliefs that are like anchors on the bottom of the ocean.  No wonder I could not swim.  This gives new meaning to let go....
I was going to a dark spot... of alone, isolated, rejected, and then... I got the "buttercup" (Scott will know)... and I just laughed.. and felt light and amused at all my seriousness.

perspective gives you the branches .. or the flower.... life is a continuous choice.