I don't enjoy being a "GIRL"

Last evening after a beer or two I ventured down to the facial place.  They have a special for about $10 dollars  but by the time they tell you how bad your face is... you pay about 30.  I was prepared for that and also while I thought I had done well with my new home routine.  I have been up for hours and have collected a lot of grime from the street. As I approached, a technician stepped out and took one look at my face and knew we were going to be intimately living together for the next several hours. First she said the seaweed was going to be good for me but as she started...we were definitely into the deep cleaning mask.  I looked about later and everyone had the deep cleaning.  I bet they don't even have seaweed.  She then looked at my legs and said wax...NO..

She looked at my chin, mustache, and eyebrows....and again said wax...but this time it was more of course no self respecting person would look like that and I have a reputation  to uphold.....so after a few seconds....OK .

She got right to it...cream slog slop slither... oil...clean and then with out much pre-warning....wax and rip  rip rip... I now know that the chin is the least tender spot.... OK...I can do this.   

I never thought I had a multi layer mustache...but she waxed and rip  rip rip....about 5  times...  I still was stoic. and now knew the meaning of stiff upper lip.

Now onto the eyes.. I never knew I had hair on my eye lids.... oh god... and  how wide was my eyebrow....I liked my eye brows...wax rip wax rip.. and then blot the tears rolling down my cheek...  am I crying from the pain  or the loss of the dear friends of my face......In a few minutes I was about to wish she would go back to wax and rip.   I was thinking of the movie 40 yr old virgin and thinking some of those hairs have been with me since I was a virgin....sigh....

Then came the steam.... and the flaw finder prob.... oh god....oh god....blot the tears....stop crying... then I thought... I was too busy tending to business to cry for Georgette...so maybe these are just old tears leaving with the old black heads...It went on forever...and the slab was making my back sore... and would I be able to walk out of here...oh god ...I have a small head and face...how many more... then came the sanding and polishing and I was beginning to feel like the Lamborghini....but shiny....  finally the blessed cold (near freezing) cucumbers....ah...it is over.   I am going to print this out and carry it in my wallet...but no....I will do this again in a few weeks when Kim comes... can hardly wait...but no wax..