This past spring/summer/fall at home felt like a hard road to walk. 

  I often felt like I was not in step with those around me.

   I sensed that no matter that foot I put forward, it was the wrong foot.

  Even in the short time that I have been away, 

    I know, I can't go back to that life.

  Here, I am walking a different path, my path, on two feet

     I am enjoying my days... and I smile and want to get out of bed.

         I see some very simple changes that will make my life much more satisfying and reduce the frustration and isolation I have felt.

1.     When I see a list of project, ideas, tasks, I need to join a committee rather than become the committee of one.   If no one else thinks it is a good idea, project, and task and worth putting in the time and effort, I will live with it never being accomplished.   My ethics will keep me a hard worker, but I do not need to be the leader.  If others are doing something, anything, etc. and there is a forward motion on a project, I will pick a simple task and do it and leave the rest of the pile for others and walk on.

2.     I want to have a social life – but I want it to be my choice of whom and when and what I do.  I found myself feeling sad about not being included in events with people that I don’t want to spend time with doing things that I don’t enjoy doing particularly when large amounts of alcohol are involved. I need to acknowledge who I am and acknowledge others for who they are and live and let live.   I will not hop on my left foot just to belong.  So, I need to join groups and discussions that bring me joy, inspiration and where I feel growth and enhancement.

3.     I will love people wherever they are on their personal journey and accept those that live unexamined lives, but I don’t have to life with them but smile at as many people as possible.

4.     I will keep the vision of where I want to go and create a game plan to get there.  To know my path, I will drop as many of the automatic routines as I can identify – all or nothing thinking, emotional reasoning, personalizing, and mind reading is but a few.

5.     Most importantly, I will surround myself with inspiring people.   They are out there… I know because when I look I find them, and I become alive and energized.  

I am excited about my future and commit to living every day awake and alive.